So I missed a night

I'm told I forgot to blog last night and after checking there is no record of my blog, must have hit the wrong button or could I have forgotten to write one?

It really has been that kind of week.  I must tell you I finally did receive payment for one appraisal today in the mail.  So I raced to the bank and made a deposit.  I was so thankful for that one check but of course I desperately need lots more.  Frankly I'm not sure what to think, I have laid out what my needs are before the Lord but there appears to be little or no answers coming.  There are lots of new orders, not enough to get me caught up but still a really solid amount and many will not be paid for for at least a month but I'll need the funds then too.

This morning at a 10 am appointment I found Margo at the door.  She was a fellow travel agent who worked with Nan.  She has found a nice guy who was visiting from Florida some time back and they spend some time in Florida and some time here.  We had a delightful talk, they love motorhomes, diesel engines, travel, grandkids so we had a lot to chat about.  It was a nice moment.

Afterwards I drove over to visit the motorhome and Ken at Cornfest.  What a huge understaking this is.  This evening Nikki and girls had me go with them to see the Cornfest as the day was cooling and this evening it has been almost chilly, really terrific, they had arcades which the little girls loved, a petting zoo and pony rides and lots of good live music.  We got to see LeAnn for a bit, Ken's wife, Ken and LeAnn are our long time neighbors to the east side of us and Ken is pretty much responsible for the CornFest.  Tonight there were thousands of people there enjoying good eats, the carnival, music on two stages and lots of craft booths to tempt people to part with their money.

I've included a few photos from this evening.  Anything one does with little ones is magic and tonight was no exception.  The fireworks display was incredible and lasted for about 30 minutes.  Kallie was ready to go home and Keanna covered her ears but we all had a great time.

I'm glad for the break, for the Sabbath and it looks like I'll be taking the girls to SS in the morning which is always fun to do.

So for now, enjoy the photos and love the ones you are with.

Tim

Still no money

For those of you who think I'm just obsessed with money, well may I kindly suggest you go without any income for 3 weeks and still have many business related expenses that are taking place every day.  I'm so far beyond despair yet my work load is full.  I wrote three reviews today including a very tough one for a little place in Brentwood.  The report was completed in 2007 and now Freddi Mac wants to know if it was done correctly or not.  It was not and was about $40,000 to high at the time but proving my case took hours of work.  Much more work than creating a new appraisal from scratch.

Orders have come in, 4 in all today for which I am eternally grateful.  They are all full orders instead of reviews so they pay more.  I've noticed that companies are starting to increase what they pay gradually.  I think they are getting the message that they are killing us off slowly but actually every day.  Nearly 1/2 of the CA appraisers have quit or are about to quit, its that bad.  My income is down to about 1/5 of what it used to be.

Its been a pleasant day, well it was until the mail came.  I was quickly confident that there would be something in the mail but instead of checks there were more hassles.  Today I dealt with Apria who is charging me a lot more each month than the amount I had been told would be charged and after a long hold time I spoke to several people there, none were helpful.

In the morning I'm going to see my doctor and get going on some new blood work, its way past time.

Well thats about it for today.  At 6:15 I inspected a property in Stockton this evening.  Then home to find more orders and I've just took a few minutes to watch part of Covert Affairs, a program I enjoy a lot.

Have a good night,

Love to all

Tim

And then Summer arrived....whew

Dear Friends and Family,

Well our hot weather is upon us.  When I headed to bed last night I forgot I had not turned the AC on and the room was incredibly hot so I came back downstairs and worked until 12:30.  It was growing cooler and I feel asleep instantly.
This morning once I was fully awake I stumbled from bed and went outside to dump the RV tanks while it was still sort of cool.  With that task behind me I turned to fixing a valve that was dumping water under the front lawn.  After fighting that for awhile I retrieved the pipe wrench that Jerry had thought to bring me on his last trip.  That did the trick and after a quick trip to ACE in town for a cap the leak was repaired.  Then looking at the fast growing lawn I grabbed the push mower and knocked down the grass, by then it was hot and that was not really a fun exercise but it did get my heart pumping.  Once inside I made a smoothie with blue berries, strawberries, a fig newton bar, some protein powder, soy milk, ice and water along with a banana.  It was great.
Then I settled in to write up an appraisal that was due today.  Can you imagine my disappointment when upon completing the report I discovered that I had not taken the comp photos.  I had been forced to find a bathroom which happened to be a Burger King.  Once I finished eating I just drove home totally forgetting to go back and shoot the comps.
That meant I had to drop everything and drive to Danville to shoot the comps.  Once that was completed I drove onto the Oakland hills and did the review, that seemed to take forever, the roads are twisted, narrow and dangerous, some teens almost ran over me but someone was watching over me and them too.  Once Oakland was put behind me I drove to Emeryville to conduct another review, then drove home arriving about 9:45.
I quickly inserted the photos into the report and just emailed it to them.  Well it is still today but a bit later than I planned.
Now its bed time for sure.
If felt different to be back to work with no kiddo smiles or play.  Now a perfect world would be to live on a street with both families living nearby.  But of course we don't live in a perfect world and I doubt Nikki and Jason would consider that a perfect world anyway, they do their own thing and do it very well.
So good night, oh by the way still no money today, its like there is a filter installed on incoming mail and all checks are sent elsewhere.  Its so past critical.
Sending love to all,

Tim

4th of July - Outstanding day

Dear Family and Friends

It started at 7 this morning when my iphone faithfully informed me that it was time to get up and go for a walk on the beach, study the breakers and breath the great sea air.  Instead I rolled over but Starr was having none of it, she wanted to get up so we did.  It was cold, well actually about 55 degrees and it felt good to walk.  There were few people on the beach, a few joggers, a lone fisherman, not even many birds, just quiet and the sea.  It was one of those moments you reach out for, cry for during the middle of a stressful week, let me have a few minutes in nature and let it heal the many cuts and scrapes that happen all through the week.  The sea, the breakers, the quiet morning did its job. 
Breakfast was happy, tasty and had a cup of Jason's famous rain forest blend coffee and Jo's crepes.  They it was packing time, for them it was for the Giants game and for me it was to head home with the coach.  Its not easy for me to drive away leaving an important part of my family behind but partings are the price you pay for gatherings and the gatherings are worth it all.
 As I headed home I made contact with by brother Jerry and sister Sibyl via the blue tooth in my ear.  I even reached Sylvia who was surrounded with little ones in a part somewhere in Tracy. 

 As I drove each crest of a hill yielded an increase in the ambient temperature until I found downright heat as I guided the motorhome into my own valley, the cool crisp air of the morning was replaced with the furnace of the Discovery Bay.

Once home I plugged the motorhome into the outlet at my home and turned on the roof AC so unloading would be comfortable.  Once inside I found I had left the AC on 77, not what I planned to do at all, waste of money but nice today.  The office was comfortable due to a little window AC that works faithfully to keep the computers and printers from being too hot.  I settled in and did research for some of the drivebys that I planned to visit this afternoon.  As the afternoon passed I decided to just do the Brentwood and Antioch work and leave the other more distant locations for tomorrow.  Their dues dates were further out than I had expected.  Nikki invited me to a BBQ at their home, something you never want to miss.  I went over and watched as Kallie enjoyed their new pool as Steve tried to make his Stainless Steel BBQ work, it never would with three different propane tanks even.  But Nikki had plenty of excellent food going in the kitchen.  For one thing she had the best corn of the season, grillers, mashed potatoes, tasty breads and hot dogs.  No one was hungry afterwards. 
As the evening progressed and the sun set the action moved to the street where many little fireworks just happened to burst into glory, kids played with sparklers and everyone had a great time talking.  We had to keep a watchful eye out for the police who were out in force trying to keep Discovery Bay from burning its self down.  A great time was had by all.
Now I'm home, sharing some thoughts with you and then heading to bed.
Last week was tough to muddle through.  Many things made it depressing and frightening and my emotional state was pretty low yet once again a chance to be with family, to feel alive and human again, its a real lift.
As you know I am a great believer in starting over, I do not see any weakness in starting over from scratch so that's where I find myself again and I welcome the chance, the opportunities this week offers.  Thank you for standing with me during last week when I was pretty low.

So tonight I'm sending a special expression of gratitude to my family.  You are really great.

Love to all

tim

A great day

Hi, this has been a wonderful day with tons of kiddo time, great food, perfect weather and fun. Today Mia was crawling up a storm. She wanted to play with Timothy's cars and would crawl after them as Jo moved them forward. She is really determined and makes funny faces as she crawls. She is a very willing eater and wants constant bites of food once you start. We had lunch with Chris and Stephanie. Chris used to be jason's roomate in the Texas house. I've had Starr on the grass for long periods of time which she loved.

In the morning I'll head back home so ken can use the motorhome for cornfest in Brentwood.

I have lots of work to do once I get home for which I am grateful.

This is a short message tonight because I'm sending it from the iPhone.

Love to all. Enjoy the 4th!

Tim

At MBA

As I write this evening I'm in an interesting scene.  Timothy is eating an ice cream cone which I've just filled with soy ice cream, a purchase I made this afternoon as I was on my way here.  Mia is crawling over the floor chasing toys and Uncle Clayton is watching over her with earphones on his ears.  He just told me, to keep Mia busy just give her something shiny like a crow.  Interesting observation.  So these two kids are in the great experienced hands of Pappa, official diaper changer and Clayton, baby feeder. 
I started the day trying to pray and clear my head of many conflicting ideas and fears,  once I got up and showered things began to work in my meager brain.  I drove over to see if Kallie could go to SS but that did not work out, the girls had plans.  I finally decided I would bring the motorhome and enjoy my stay but that meant some very hot work, carrying things to the coach, moving it out from its parking place next to the garage, starting the frig.  After awhile I decided that I had enough on board and closed the garage door.  Starr was sitting on her towel and very excited about taking the trip.  She loves to travel and get out of her tiny existence in the office.
The trip seemed to take forever.  Once I reached San Jose and turned south on 101 I remembered Nikki's words, remember don't go down 101 due to the huge motorcycle rally in Hollister.  Well it was too late to turn back but it took an extra hour getting to the place where I turned toward Watsonville. 
Once I made that final turn onto 129 I think it is the air began to cool.  I had left Discovery Bay with an expected temperature of over 100 today and it was a balmy perfect day when I arrived.  Mia was awake and crawling on the floor but Timothy and Clayton were napping.  It was great to see Jason and Jo once again and after a bit we all went our own ways for a nap. The cool breezes wafting through the motorhome made for a relaxing place to snooze.  But soon Jason and Timothy were at the door asking, want to go to the beach?  Well you bet.
We enjoyed meeting people and sharing some pleasant time as the breakers crashed nearby.  Several v shaped flocks of Brown Pelicans flew over gliding with hardly any wing movement.  They were beautiful.  Eventually we headed back home and Timothy was chattering about what he had seen and was soon to do.  He is a very bright boy with so much spirit and spunk. Totally fun to observe.
Jo had prepared some vegan apple crunch which along with the ice cream I had picked up on the way was heavenly.
This evening Jason and Jo dressed for their night out, celebrating their July 4th anniversary.  They have texted in a few times to check on things.  I made the mistake of putting Mia down too soon.  She wanted none of it and cried huge tears for about 15 minutes.  Finally Clayton and I picked her up, calmed her down and then she sat with us on the couch for about 45 minutes playing, smiling and finally showed signs of becoming sleepy.  This time when I put her in her bed, it was instant sleep.
I'm in that frame of mind, you know the one that sames change is vacation.  Its true, as I drove down I felt the levels of frustration and fear gradually melt away and life return.  Oh yes there are challenges to meet for all of us in this family,  we are all in a time when the things we thought were forever a few years ago are now in question.  Hating change like I do and living on a level where if a door slams I jump and my heart races I seldom can say I'm at peace or enjoying life very much.  However tonight here with family it feels good.  Like last week when Kallie came to visit and it felt good, there was a clear purpose for going through the motions of living, for doing the right things, it helped someone.  Kallie had a great time on her visit, Keanna had had a wonderful afternoon with Sylvia learning how to sew and now I'm having a relaxing and meaningful time with this part of the family.  Clayton is remarkable good with the kids, he is Jo's younger brother and has lived here at times attending classes.  He came back with them from Denver since his mom is in Asia right now.  He has a gentle calming way with the kids that is quite unusual for a young man.  I've certainly appreciated working with him this evening caring for the two little ones.
So now I'll walk the few steps to the motorhome, tuck Starr in for the night and sleep alone once again.  For those of you not sleeping alone, I really hope you appreciate having someone near.  Its not just sex though that is good but even more so is having someone near who is your someone, its you and that person against the world, a coconspirator, a partner, a friend, someone to watch your back, to give you advice, feedback, to affirm your worth.
At this point I don't know whether I would be wise to just accept the fact that I'm destined to be alone for ever or to hold out hope that somewhere, sometime I'll find a person who can love me, put up with me, retrain me, can walk hand in hand with me and experience the love and attention I have to given.  Perhaps time will tell.
Sending love to all, happy holiday

Tim

An ominous week

Good evening,
How are you tonight?  Does it feel like your life is on track?  I certainly hope so because my life feels like a process of waiting for the next crisis to hit.  I hate it.  I miss the life where there was laughter, good food, travel and balance.  I'm wondering if this is it, is this how its going to be from now on.  I know that some of you will identify with the feelings, drastic changes are thrust on you and then you have to just deal with life on a day to day basis with little hope or meaning.

This morning I woke to a sunny day outside, made breakfast and then set to work.  I have a golden opportunity to work for two new companies but each requires an E&O policy with a million dollar coverage.  I've reduced my coverage to just $500,000 for the last few years but today I took the steps to get the policy back to the million dollar level.  It only cost $16 to get the coverage and I thought it was worth it. That took a few hours to get filled out, scanned and emailed back to the broker.  Once I get the new binder then I can apply with these new companies, these are companies that asked me to join, not the other way around so it is promising.

Today I've spend a lot of time doing conditions, you know those free hours when you fix things because someone in the food chain decided they wanted wording just their way.  Today is was please confirm that the 4 wall heaters for the subject property can keep the home above 50 degrees and are typical of the area.  Well in Richmond probably half of the homes have wall heaters, its that kind of thing that drives you crazy.  There are so many little minds in the whole process and any one of them can demand something even if it has nothing to do with the resulting loan.  Fun fun.

I think I'm taking Kallie to SS in the morning and then I'm driving down to MBA to see the kiddos there.  Its been a while and I look forward to seeing them all.  This time its the bug going, not the motorhome since I just can't justify driving the coach all that way and spending about $70 in the process.  I might rethink this tomorrow but for now I plan to drive the bug.

So for now its bed time,  I want to thank those of you who took time to remember me in prayer.  I have to admit I have a lot on my mind.  Its nice to be remembered.

Love to one and all,

Tim