Does it seem to you that when you look way back things were better, calmer, made more sense? It sure does to me, living in real time seems to be one set of challenges linked to another set of almost impossible challenges. I could not begin to explain how difficult it is to make some of these appraisal orders work out. Yes its true many are cookie cutters and are relatively simple but there are some that just never seem to work out. I know Steve feels the same, once in awhile you get an order and no matter how you approach it there is something more the lenders or underwriters want and now we have to get through a maze of wanta be underwriters that the management companies hire. These are people who gave up on being appraisers and have passed to the very dark side. They work for the enemy it seems. They can be so demanding and require things that no underwriter would ever ask for but if we want more work we have to play along, be nice, do nice and rewrite over and over again. Bitter, not really but I sure don't enjoy the nasty side of this business.
Last night was horrible. I'm hoping not to repeat it for a very long time. Seems that some people have trouble sleeping when they first start taking insulin and I did start last night. I was up, literally up from 2 to 3:30 this morning, sitting down here in the office, wide away and super upset. There were things on my mind that I could not fix or solve but they were still there. Sometimes bad things happen to very good people, you know of situations like that.
The high point of this day came at 12:45 when I picked up Ms Keanna. She did her homework and dazzled me with her reading skills, her spelling and her ability to move through pages of homework fast. I was able to write three reports today and am working on the 4th now. A few minutes ago my HP1000, a very old and very good printer decided to wrap a legal length page in a very small space inside, the only way I know how to get it out is with needle nose pliers and of course while I was doing the work I broke a tiny roller, vital to the operation. Well I just happen to have a backup HP 1000 that used to sit on Nan's desk and failed some time ago. So I found it and carefully removed this little roller and its spring and with God's help installed it. Now the printer works well again but it cost me about 30 minutes.
At 5:15 I left for spin class only to find it was totally full, no bikes were available when I got there so I just came home. That was disappointing. Next time I'll just get there early and get a bike. Lesson learned. I came home and baked a little potato, covered it with pinto beans, mushrooms and a bit of cottage cheese. It tasted great. Just before the meal my blood was 116 and this morning it was 161, both numbers are much better than at any point in the past year so I think the insulin is working.
I find life so confusing sometime. It is frustrating but I can hardly remember life with a loving spouse, just too long ago, I know it happened and I have happy memories, pictures but to really remember it in a living way, that I can't do. I often wonder if I'll ever really be happy with someone again. Is it worth even trying, some people just go out and hook up right away, I've not found it that easy, makes one doubt if he is really worth someones time, hard questions to answer.
Well back to work, another cold night. My brother reports that life in Weed is pretty treacherous this evening with snow, wind and cold weather. I understand it is coming this way. I also note that I'm deep into my wood pile now and have had a fire going for the last few days, it is so nice to be warm and toasty.
Love to all,
thanks for your prayers for special situations.
Tim
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