Home again

Dear Family and Friends,
Its about 9:30 and I'm home rested and relaxed.  Now come morning all that will change as the rat race picks up again.  Tonight I've got a fire going, I'm just sorting things in the office and deciding what needs to be done next in the morning.

There is something very trans formative about visiting MBA and the kids.  I leave Discovery Bay having just loaded the motor home in a rush, trying to make sure everything I need is on board.  There is finally that magic moment when I push the button, the garage door closes and I'm on my way. At first the motor home seems large and ungainly as I maneuver the local narrow streets but then I finally reach Highway 4 and can speed up.  Gradually I become accustomed to the width and size of the motor home and I begin to enjoy its power, the view of the surrounding world it affords and just the fact that I am escaping the punishing effects of running a small business with checking accounts to balance, reports to complete, others to schedule, calls to return and an occasional meal.  It just builds and builds, then add to the mix being sick, not feeling up to doing anything much less make decisions about million dollar properties, writing reports that matter to someone, knowing all the while that any report can come back in the form of a lawsuit even up to many years later.  I like my job, my profession but it has its challenges.  Then stir in the mix my trying to get a handle on managing the blood sugar levels, starting insulin, remembering to eat veges and fruits, to watch carbs and stir in a dose of loneliness, facing everything day by day alone without a partner to scheme with, to escape with, to plan with, to listen to.  Its a different life than in the past, one with far less joy, were it not for the kiddos and the kids the joy factor would be much lower but they all bring great happiness and downright fun.  There are eight people who brighten my day every time I see them and I consider them my mission, my purpose. 

So having slipped away to MBA, this time Friday afternoon with a quick stop in San Martin for some grub and having a perfect trip in the coach, everything worked perfectly, I'm now savoring the experience.  I'm concerned that I may have left some bad bugs for my little kiddos, Timothy was starting to cough this afternoon and I so hope I did not make him sick.  He and I worked together this morning when it was time to unhook the coach and prepare to leave.  He helped me wind up the electrical cord, he helped with the hoses that bring fresh water, he helped turn the seats into their forward position for travel, he is just too cute.  This time I scored, Jo sent home a frozen loaf of her home make bread.  She just started making bread and it is a great success.  So she shared one of the loaves of her labor and its safely in my freezer now.

As I was driving out of MBA I turned toward the ocean, walked down to the bluff and just sat for a few minutes thinking about life, about how things keep changing, about how hard that is to accept that things are going to change, about how I thought of life when I was in my thirties, how different from now.  I love my children, I'm proud of their spunk, their fierce independence and their opinions.  I'm grateful that they let me hand out sometimes with them, its a game changer for me.

This afternoon as I was driving home I called my neighbor Patty.  Now Patty is the bravest senior I know.  She has 7 grandchildren living under her care and under her roof in a house that measures less than 1700 sf.  She cares for them full time, drives them to where they need to go, they range in age of 1 year to 20 and I just treasure time I get to spend with her, she is amazing.  Well I happen to know she knows her way around a sewing machine and I have some little loops that keep the privacy curtain that covers the front windshield in the motor home in place.  Some of the little loops of string have broken and I thought who better than Patty to know how to fix them.  So I called.  She came down after I got home and we went over the curtains and she knows she can fix them which is great news!  She also agreed to help Keanna learn how to enjoy her sewing machine that Santa brought.  So that will be great news for Keanna.  Patty and I talked for a long time, she lost her precious Chuck about a year before I lost Nan and we met in grief group.  She was telling me all kinds of way to save money including going to the movies before noon on Mondays, only $5 and they give other discounts too, I could see myself going with Patty to the movies.  She says she takes Mondays off, I was glad to learn she gets a day off.

Well its bed time, my throat is sore and I've coughed some today but I think things are better and I hope to keep them that way.

I know of people with special needs right now, can you join me in praying?  Thanks

Love

tim